lightwithin | 4th ♥ Plantfection [Audio]

Hmm.

[Let's have another pause! Because really, Riku can't just be blunt and forthright with things. It goes against his sudden need to be ~mysterious~.]

Ironhide said the two of you used to be close.

[His tone is not accusing like it might have been, had he been his younger self. Instead, this Riku remains neutral.]

[The neutrality is jarring. Xanth wonders if Riku is truly neutral, or if he's just become that much better at covering his feelings.

Xanth chooses his words carefully.]

W-We... we were. W-We were-- really, r-really good fr--friends. Sh-She... helped me g--get through a... a-a lot of-- of stuff.

[But though he's made no hint at romance, there's a thickness to his voice that speaks only of love.]

[It's a bit of both, really. Obvious emotion would have been a dead giveaway when he'd been trying to hide away from the Organization. It made things easier if he just. Didn't let them affect him.

There's also the little fact that he doesn't feel like he's got any right to pursue Kairi any more, as obviously she wouldn't want to be with him considering all his past mistakes, but. Yeah. Riku notices the way his voice changes--understands.]

And you loved her?

[It's only half a question.]

[Xanth looks to the wall, biting his lip, and then he looks to Riku. For a few seconds, he holds Riku's gaze, and then he says softly:]

Wh--what do you th-think?

[Half an answer for half a question.]

[But to Riku, that's a full answer, because he can't imagine anyone knowing Kairi and -not- coming to love her.]

You're right, that was a stupid question.

Of course you did.

Yeah. A-A-- a lot.

[But these three words, simple as they are, have a tint of bitterness. Talking to Riku of all people about this of all subjects is... wrong. But he's been so damn obvious about it - how could he not expect Riku to notice or wonder?]

[Riku turns away from Xanth, leaning back into the wall and glancing inside towards Kairi's sleeping form once again. He knows she can't hear them out here, but nevertheless, when he speaks his words are quiet.]

I did too.

[Silently, Xanth nods. He knew that already - the Riku he knew made it very clear - but this Riku couldn't know that. Here Riku had opened Xanth up, but instead of attacking, he'd laid himself bare the same way. That is the most jarring thing of all.

But wait.

Frowning, Xanth shoots Riku a side-glance.]

D... 'Did'?

[Heh. He should've known Xanth would pick up on that.]

I still do.

[It feels strange, admitting all of this. But for some reason, it's not as hard as he imagined it would be--maybe because Xanth is in the same boat.]

A lot happened.

[Xanth folds his arms and leans against the wall, resting his head upon it. Then, he sighs.]

Y--Yeah. I-I know... what-- what that's l-like.

[So much has happened. So much keeps happening. But talking this over so very casually, with the boy who was his enemy for so long, is surprisingly comfortable.]

D-Does she... kn--know?

[Because Xanth is quite certain she knows how he feels - or she will if she remembers any of their conversation tonight.]

[Riku gives a very small, mirthless chuckle.]

No.

[She only has eyes for Sora. By this point, Riku's sure that in spite of how much she'll flirt with him, Kairi will never see him as anything more. And it's not as though he's got any room to even wish for more; after everything he's done, it's nothing short of a miracle that Kairi even wants him around.]

She doesn't.

[He -couldn't- tell her.]

[For a few seconds, Xanth is quiet and chews on his lip.]

Sh-She's... m-more perceptive th-than you-- y-you give her credit for.

[But even if she notices Riku's feelings, she'll dance around the subject until Riku forces the issue. That's just how Kairi is: as far as romance is concerned, she deflects and avoids her suitors.

Xanth suspects there is a difference where Sora is concerned.]

[Riku shakes his head.]

She doesn’t look at me that way.

I’m not sure she ever did.

[-That- admission is a little bit more difficult. But it’s also true: Kairi may flirt and tease, but there’s never been anything more behind it, never any glimpse of an idea that she might have considered it more than playful banter between two friends.

She doesn’t know.

And he can’t burden her by telling her. Not now.]

[This time, when Xanth sinks into silence, he doesn't pull himself out again. He grapples, instead, with a familiar emotion: pity. But he feels it for Riku - how terribly foreign.

And then he realizes that if Riku is correct, Xanth may have had nothing to worry about on the Elegante. As much as Riku fought for Kairi's affections, if she'd never felt that way about him at all, then all his feuds may have been more pointless than they already were.

It still doesn't excuse Riku's actions - Riku was beyond cruel - but it puts them in a new light.

Eventually, he speaks up again.]

S--Sorry.

4th ♥ Plantfection [Audio]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]

[Commentlog]